The Real War on Christmas: The Eviction of Santa Claus


| | | |

There's been a vicious land grab going on behind the scenes at the North Pole to take over the rights to the region, and Mr. & Mrs. Claus and the elves have nothing to say about it.

What kind of unconscionable rascals could possibly be behind an eminent domain conspiracy to oust Santa from his longtime home at the North Pole?


Meet Bush and Bush Buddies (the newly "elected") SANTA OUSTERS

Take a look at these three musketeers -- a few of the key playa's involved in meetings and mappings to divvy up the Arctic Sea's riches. These are the Anti Santa Squad - North American Contingent. And they're not alone. There are five other nations competing for the title to the land of booty. (See below)

Two years ago I put a spotlight on early maneuvers going on in the Arctic region with this CCN blog:

http://securingamerica.com/ccn/node/3145

THE KEY CLAUSE defining the issue in a bottom-line manner is:

"By some official estimates, the Arctic may hold a quarter of the world's undiscovered oil and gas."

It's been hypothesized it may contain up to 10 billion tons of oil and gas. Ten. Billion.

Ahhh, that makes sense now. Buh Bye Santa Claus! The toy factory is about to be torn down and replaced by a few off shore rigs and deep water drilling systems.

By latest scientific observations, the Arctic sea ice is down to 2.05 million square miles. It is the smallest ever size that the Arctic sea ice had become since satellite observation of the area began, in 1978.

Latest reports reveal the Arctic is warming twice as fast as the rest of the planet and that the North Pole could be ice-free by the end of the century. Around the Arctic, salmon are moving up into more northerly waters, hornets are beginning to buzz and barn owls are appearing in regions where indigenous people have never seen a barn. Polar bears are "unlikely to survive as a species" if the ice disappears.

Although this data does not bode well for the polar bears, penguins, humans living near shorelines, and Inuits... It's really neat for the oil/gas industry! Providing suddenly easy access to these newfound caches of inky resources. Passage through the straits becomes instantly navigable, and ability to install off shore equipment... why, it's practically a serendipitous stroke of good timing for the energy industry!

But wait...

What's Russia doing planting underwater flags into OUR oil beds?

-------------------------------------

OSLO -- A Russian flag on the seabed beneath the ice of the North Pole is among the few signs that states are waking up to a 2009 deadline for what may be the last big carve-up of maritime territory in history.

~~~~~~
Russia made big international waves last week with a successful Arctic expedition. The research ship Akademik Fedorov and the nuclear icebreaker Arktika left Murmansk on July 24 and on August 2 reached their destination – the North Pole, now covered by only a thin layer of ice thanks to global warming. Two deep-water submersibles reached the ocean floor at this special spot at the depth of about 4,300 meters and stayed there for about an hour, collecting samples and planting a Russian flag made from titanium
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

By some estimates, about seven million square kilometres - the size of Australia - could be divided up around the world with so far unknown riches ranging from oil and gas to seabed marine organisms at stake.

Only eight claims have been made although about 50 coastal states are bound by a May 13, 2009 deadline for submissions under a UN drive to set the now vague outer limits of each country's sea floor rights under a 1982 convention.

"We are clearly behind schedule," said Peter Croker, a senior Irish official who is the outgoing chair of the UN Commission on the Limits of the Continental Shelf,

"There's quite a lot at stake.

"This will probably be the last big shift in ownership of territory in the history of the earth," said Lars Kullerud, who advises developing states on submissions.

"Many countries don't realize how serious it is."

Yannick Beaudoin, who also works at GRID-Arendal, said:

"2009 is a final and binding deadline. This allows you to secure sovereignty without having to fight for it."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Did I read that right? "Without having to fight for it"--?
Can the Arctic Wars be far behind?

But wait...What's Canada doing bringing the military into this?

__________________________________________

HARPER BRINGS IN THE BIG GUNS:

------------------------------------------
Canada's leader to assert Arctic claim

By ROB GILLIES, Associated Press Writer

MONTEBELLO, Quebec - Canada's prime minister is expected to assert his nation's claim to the fabled Northwest Passage through the warming, resource-rich Arctic at talks with President Bush that start Monday.

Canada claimed the passage in 1973 but competition to control the Arctic has intensified with global warming. Shrinking polar ice has raised the possibility of new shipping lanes and development of what one U.S. study suggested could be as much as 25 percent of the world's undiscovered oil and gas.

Canadian Prime Minister Stephen Harper (Musketeer #1) went to the Arctic earlier this month and announced Canada will build a new army training center and a deep-water port in the Northwest passage. (Spose Santa could enlist in the Canadian Army to stay on...)

The summit involving Bush, Harper and Mexican President Felipe Calderon is largely about expanding economic cooperation among the three nations, but Harper will assert Canada's claim during a private meeting with Bush, Canadian officials said at a press briefing on the summit.

The United States, Denmark, and Norway also have claims in the Arctic, and the U.S. says the passage isn't Canadian.

Harper has said Canada's new military installations will help back up Canada's claim to the waters and natural resources of the Northwest Passage, which runs below the North Pole from the Atlantic to the Pacific through the Arctic archipelago.

----------------------

LIST OF OIL-GRUBBING SANTA-EVICTING NATIONS:

RUSSIA:

About 50 Russian scientists spent six weeks mapping the Arctic seabed this spring, and returned in June to say they had confirmed Russia's claim to the region.

UNITED STATES:

US politicians, including Senator Richard Lugar, have urged defense of their country's Arctic interests to stand up to Russian claims over large stretches of the seabed. "Unless the United States ratifies the treaty, Moscow will be able to press its claims without an American at the table," Senator Lugar said in May, referring to the Law of the Sea treaty, a complex agreement on territorial sovereignty.

DENMARK:

Thorkild Meedom of Denmark's Ministry of Science, Technology and Innovation said Danish scientists on icebreakers are now conducting mapping studies of the north polar sea.
"We're going step by step and mapping as conditions permit,"

CANADA:

Canadian Prime Minister Stephen Harper said earlier this month that Canada plans to spend $7 billion to build and operate up to eight Arctic patrol ships. "In defending our nation's sovereignty, nothing is as fundamental as protecting Canada's territorial integrity"

NORWAY- WIth the Diplomatic Approach

Norwegian Foreign Minister Jonas Gahr Stoere says there are established procedures to deal with the issue. "If anybody is under the belief that we solve this by racing up there with flags or other demonstrations of sovereignty, those who say that are wrong and they should be told they are wrong," he said. "There's no need to see this as a race, it is not the way you settle these kind of issues."

AUSTRALIA:

"Australia itself has tried to make a claim to an extended continental shelf around its Antarctic and sub-Antarctic possessions... Australia is quite used to this concept as well and stands to benefit from it,"

FRANCE

Probably just to piss off America

And perhaps the most curious one of all...
BRAZIL???

Even Santa Claus was confused by that claim, but he is said to be currently engaged in secret negotiations with Brazilian representatives to relocate himself, his Mrs., the elves, reindeer, and entire workshop operation to sunny Ipanema, as a trade off for eviction. Mrs. Clause is protesting the move but apparently has no say in the matter.

Developing.

Submitted by ms in la on August 19, 2007 - 7:31pm.

the 'Arctic Pirates' (Arrrrrr!) are manning the ships and preparing for what may amount to the Final Earth Plunder for unclaimed territory and resources in our history.

Any bets on who'll win the booty?

My money is on a yet unformed alliance between Canada and the US, up against Russia, with Denmark coming in as a silent partner associate of US.

I think Brazil and France will be out in the first round...

jen's picture
Submitted by jen on August 19, 2007 - 8:43pm.

PNAC better get on the ball and revise their ME plans, doncha think? Or did darth cheney and his Energy Task Force croneys already draw up new plans for this new area of earth to dominate?

And if Santa, the Mrs., the elves and reindeer move to Ipanema, will this be the new Santa outfit?


And while everyone's worried about the polar bears, what about Frosty??


Once in a while you get shown the light, In the strangest of places if you look at it right.


Four Stars for President 2008


Submitted by ms in la on August 19, 2007 - 10:22pm.

LOL!

That was the subject line of an erotic greeting card with a puddle on the cover, a stovepipe hat and corncob pipe laying in the puddle.

Ya know Jen, I do think this may have to be an "Addendum" Update plan, an added chapter for the "PNACers Guide to Domination of the Universe as We Know It" (more commonly known in DC circles as "PGDUAWKI")

"The Arctic Circle Take Over Chapter"

PS: Nice summer Santa get up! : )

early-bird's picture
Submitted by early-bird on August 19, 2007 - 9:03pm.

 

when Stephe-and-opulus opened with Obama aint' got experience; he said Rumselfd and Cheney had experience LOL

he did another good one liner: said he prepared for the debate by going on the bumper cars at the Iowa fair;

 he broke through to my funny meter;  

 

 

Poll 85% think global warming is happening the other 15% work for the White House  synthetic environment


early-bird's picture
Submitted by early-bird on August 19, 2007 - 9:33pm.

house_wide.jpg 

Poll 85% think global warming is happening the other 15% work for the White House  synthetic environment


LJM's picture
Submitted by LJM on August 19, 2007 - 9:42pm.

We wants it.


Submitted by Tom Rinaldo on August 19, 2007 - 10:29pm.

but there's also the lure of a future livable climate.
I expect we can look forward to a lot of wealthy and powerful folks buying up choice Arctic summer homes (or house boats or whatever).

Submitted by ms in la on August 19, 2007 - 10:46pm.

Disney will be on the first icebreakers we send in. : )

They are looking into Arctic DisneyWorld Theme park and hotel.

Yep, you're right. I see future resort vacations... the Tahiti of the Bering Sea. (after the ice is gone) Rigs can be camouflaged to look like big fat palm tree groves (Disney expertise)

Arctic high rises; penthouse with an arhipelago view...

Comment viewing options

Select your preferred way to display the comments and click "Save settings" to activate your changes.